Hard Times

Time's are hard when it gets near the holidays.  The last time I saw my mom was the day after Christmas and I got to stay with her for the night.  Not knowing that it would be my last time ever.  I would have made the time that we spent together even more special than it already was.  When I heard that my mom had passed away I didn't want to believe it but now I know because she is in a jar.  I miss her so much.  She was my best friend and now I feel so alone because nothing since she passed has been good in my life.  I have a very dysfunctional family and my best friend won't even hangout with me anymore or call me because she is so into school.  Also my other friend left 2 years ago and moved to Florida.  She also never answers her phone.  I used to talk to my mom everyday on the phone and it made me feel like she really loved me.  I also got a card from her every month in the mail.  Now I am a senior in high school and my mom won't even get to see me graduate which makes me really sad.  She would be so proud of the young lady that I have become.  I am really disliking school right now.  I feel super stressed because I want to do my best but it's getting really hard.  I just want to be done.